(Sub)[urban]ism -vs- (pc)ism -vs- Gabe(ism): A multi-part series

Sub-Urban-ism:

Sub-urban-ism are words most commonly used in “da hood,” “da ghetto,” The Green Acres Mall in Valley Stream, NY. Ebonics, black-speak, chocolate-rain, jive-talking are different variations of this amazing dialect.

Unfortunately, these words are also commonly used by wiggers, strip mall dirtbags, frat boys and their associates (a.k.a. bros) as a means to make themselves seem like they’re “da shit” and more in tune with whats “down” with brown folks (homies). These are despicable creatures that need to be ridiculed on site. Their constant abuse of urbandictionary.com (and the like) garner them high marks for tomfoolery and douchebaggery.

PC-ism:

PC-ism (a.ka. politically correct) version of sub-urban-ism. There may have underlying racial undertones and / or stereotypes without classifying the user as a bigot or bias against any distinctive persons. Also, these allow the user to fire remarks that create generalizations about someone or something, without the serious recuperations . Mostly used around office spaces and /or work related functions and people you just don’t like. People who use these on daily basis are fake mofos and are not your friends. Some pc-isms are classified as positive racism.

Gabe-ism:

Gabe-ism is a state of being coined by a oblivious racist named Gabriel P. Essentially, this is positive racism gone horribly wrong. These remarks will offend anyone and everyone within an earshot. These statements are similar to things you would here from a hate group.

Now there’s one subject matter that everyone can agree upon… Titties (especially big breastesses). Do you know when to use the correct vernacular for describing some hefty chesticles? What can only be described as “the filet mignon of the mammaries” never ceases to amaze the human eye (and the male loins). Whether you like them big or small you can’t help but to gawk in awe.

Hence the need for Sub-Urban-ism, PC-ism, and Gabe-ism.

Tits: Titties, Breasts, Chest Handles, Speed Bumps, etc.

(Sub)[Urban]ism:

Big ‘Ol Titties or Tig Bitties

(PC)ism:

The technology to capture beams of God’s love hasn’t been invented yet.

Gabe(ism):

Why did _____________ (insert ethically large breasted woman’s name here) get mad when I said, if her brains were as big as breasts, she would need to be fucking her boss for the X-Mas bonus.

I welcome any suggestions.

Peace out,

The Kid.

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About kidhasselhoff

In the english language, (neither american nor british) I'm what's refered to as a jerkoff. I'm old enough to screw your mom (and yes i have literally screwed a few moms in my day). I'm the guy who picks his nose and wipes the booger on someone else. Like i said i'm a jerkoff. GET OVER IT! View all posts by kidhasselhoff

One response to “(Sub)[urban]ism -vs- (pc)ism -vs- Gabe(ism): A multi-part series

  • Gabriel

    Ok now these comments called Gabeisms are claimed by others to be Positive Racists comments. From what I know there is no such thing as postitive racism. It sounds like a reinforcement of stereotypes. Yes the comments are out landish at times but what was mentioned in the article above is said by others. If there was such as thing as positive racism they are called Cultural points of view. Comments or view points have been done many times in the media in shows such as Every Body Hates Chris, Married with Children, and movies such as Do the Right thing. These cultural view points are more of a spoken thought, one everyone thinks but never really says, but is said by someone on the DL who can get away with it because you know the arent a racist. For example you say to your self “Man how can so many immagrants open stores to fast when people born in this country struggle just to save money to have a house”. Or you ever wlak down a block and say “How many more Nail Salons or Halal Meat Markets can open on one block?”
    So what ever “positive racist” are posted are outlandish. The should me made more into Cultural Points of View (ala Spike Lee).

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